' WHY '

' WHY' just a simple word but has so many question. I hope that post was not literally keep haunted your heart. Hopefully not. If I would, I want you to be with me for a very long term. Can't you see my effort? Can't you see all of my sacrifices ? Can't you feel my LOVE ? Can you SEE that ?? I'd do anything to please you. But why why why and why now? You've changed, you have changed to a someone that I'm not sure whom.

It hurts me sometimes. Badly bleed. Somebody pls pls pls help me find my Heart back? pls I'm beggin ;( I'm on my knees now, I'd hug your legs for helping me to find my Heart back. I need that Heart for stay alive. Pls help me ;( GOD, show me a way. I hate to say this but sometimes yess, I'm worried. I'm terrified that someday you'll leave me alone. I don't want that to happens. If you already make your decision, umm I couldn't say a things. I'm not goin to ask you to stay, but day by day I'm trying my best to make you feel my love, to miss me like you always does. Pls, don't make our love fade away. I hate dull, for the time being I can sense something that I dislike. Everything I do keep remind me of you. Why? Why you've changed that fast? Am I the one who screwed everythings up? Did I messed up ? What did I do wrong this time? WHAT?! Geez, I love you Heart. Why you've been acting so different. I can stand with your ego, I push my ego away just because of you. I know I'm not that perfect like your ex(s). But pls, respect me as your lover. As your partner, as your sayang. Why would you change ? What make you change ? Is't me? I'm not a pinochio. If you want me, you can just buzz me. If you don't want me you keep the distance away from me. Why ? I've no clue. I'm terrified. Do you STILL LOVE ME ? Don't simply say those 3words but yourself doesnt mean it. I need love from you. I need YOU!

F.I.N.E

I've made up me mind
Don't need to think it over
If I'm wrong I am right
Don't need to look no further
This ain't lust
I know this is love

If I tell the world
I'll never say enough
Cos it was not said to you
And that's exactly what I need to do
If I end up with you

Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements
Even if it leads no where,
Or would it be a waste
Even if I knew my place should I leave it there.
Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements
Even if it leads nowhere

I build myself up
And fly around in circles
Waiting as my heart drops
And my back begins to tingle
Finally could this be it or.

This song, well. yess, Imma start my writing with this song on repeat mode. umm, I don't know what to say. I'm not that worried, I'm not that obvious terrified, I'm not that stupid oso, and uh, I'm not a stone too. I'm a human being that been created with full of love and cares, lot's of it. I can not hope for more, I can not ask for anything that impossible to get. I know where I stand. Also, I know what I want. Me just being myself instead trying to be someone just because wanna please everyone. I need love. I need soul. I need a place or more likely to say a home. Yea, I think I already got it. I thought I've own it, Am I? Oh well, I'm not sure, I don't have any apparent reason to be like this shitty. It just hit me like a lightning. Baamm! right infront of my freakin hideous face. Sometimes, not sometimes but OFTEN. I keep askin myself, why this thingy happens all of sudden, Am I so fuckin annoying ? Am I too stupid to be with you ? Am I that terrible tremendously ugly? Am I don't deserve anything from you ? *SIGH* Well, to be truth, this is not a big deal nor matter I guess? It jes me? HAHA me??? Whatever. I'm strong enough to hold on and stay ;) That's the most friggin IMPORTANT <3 Everything has a solution, I keep bear that in my mind. I always does that ;) that's make me more stronger. Everybody make mistakes we're human being, thus nobody PERFECT ;)

Life's is about you appreciate the present not kept your past and acting like a crap. That's totally wrong! What you should do is keep smiling and leave it there. Meaning to say, accept your past and leave it there and move on. Move on for a better life. I've learn a lot from my past not less from my present too. Head up and keep smiling ;)

Second Month Anniversary & Happy Birthday Heart ;)

Hey, it has been a while since the last post of mine. Alright, here it goes. Actually I want to start this with a song. Well, its your birthday on 5th August. Apologize fer the late post. Allah selamatkan kamu , Allah selamatkan kamu, Allah selamatkan  <3 Allah selamatkan kamu ;) Selamat hari lahir sayang and selamat hari ulang tahun yang kedua ;D My genuine hope is pls be strong and always smile. Yes, you can count on me. Of course you could, I'm your lover and part of your life also. Don't ever forget that I often got your back Heart. I love you with full of my heart, you're my everything fer the time being. Appreciate the present. Enjoy every single bits memory in your life. Cherish every moment. Pls be good okay, take good care of yourself fer me. I'm not usual around to look after you. But don't forget that I always there, there, in your chest, in your Heart ;) Believe me, I won't leave you. That's my promise. You're my fav cutee lion Heart ;) Always does. Till then, I love you the most, miss you a lot sayang xx