Happy 3rd Anniversary & Happy Eid ;)

It was a superb Raya to me. Dapat beraya dengan si Dia ;) Thank you fer everything. I love your family, I'm starting  to miss that lil' girl! Well, I'm not that perfect nor that good to be your lover. But I'm trying my best to be the one who can please you. No matter what happen, we will thru this thing together. Its not jes about me, its about us. I hope you can understand in any matter. Every single thing that I do, it will reminds me of you. I might would be the water, but remember I have my limits too. I'm jes a human being like you. I have flaws. And I hope you can accept my flaws. I'll do the same. Insecurities is my nick name. Makes me to forget about that nick name. I kinda hate it. I need you to be part of me. I need you to please me too. I need you to stay by my side. Thank you , thank you and thank you. That's all I can say fer this moments. Well, 3 months and still standing, I'm pretty impressed with myself though LOL This Raya is my favorite ! I had fun, hopefully you would feel the same. I've tried to fulfill your request, I'm sorry if I bare do that. There's no words can describe how I feels right now. May you be blessed and stay happy. No need to pressure yourself, everything happen fer a reason and you are the one who should convince yourself to keep strong and hold on. I Heart You Love <3 Selamat Hari Raya and maaf zahir batin ;)

' WHY '

' WHY' just a simple word but has so many question. I hope that post was not literally keep haunted your heart. Hopefully not. If I would, I want you to be with me for a very long term. Can't you see my effort? Can't you see all of my sacrifices ? Can't you feel my LOVE ? Can you SEE that ?? I'd do anything to please you. But why why why and why now? You've changed, you have changed to a someone that I'm not sure whom.

It hurts me sometimes. Badly bleed. Somebody pls pls pls help me find my Heart back? pls I'm beggin ;( I'm on my knees now, I'd hug your legs for helping me to find my Heart back. I need that Heart for stay alive. Pls help me ;( GOD, show me a way. I hate to say this but sometimes yess, I'm worried. I'm terrified that someday you'll leave me alone. I don't want that to happens. If you already make your decision, umm I couldn't say a things. I'm not goin to ask you to stay, but day by day I'm trying my best to make you feel my love, to miss me like you always does. Pls, don't make our love fade away. I hate dull, for the time being I can sense something that I dislike. Everything I do keep remind me of you. Why? Why you've changed that fast? Am I the one who screwed everythings up? Did I messed up ? What did I do wrong this time? WHAT?! Geez, I love you Heart. Why you've been acting so different. I can stand with your ego, I push my ego away just because of you. I know I'm not that perfect like your ex(s). But pls, respect me as your lover. As your partner, as your sayang. Why would you change ? What make you change ? Is't me? I'm not a pinochio. If you want me, you can just buzz me. If you don't want me you keep the distance away from me. Why ? I've no clue. I'm terrified. Do you STILL LOVE ME ? Don't simply say those 3words but yourself doesnt mean it. I need love from you. I need YOU!

F.I.N.E

I've made up me mind
Don't need to think it over
If I'm wrong I am right
Don't need to look no further
This ain't lust
I know this is love

If I tell the world
I'll never say enough
Cos it was not said to you
And that's exactly what I need to do
If I end up with you

Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements
Even if it leads no where,
Or would it be a waste
Even if I knew my place should I leave it there.
Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements
Even if it leads nowhere

I build myself up
And fly around in circles
Waiting as my heart drops
And my back begins to tingle
Finally could this be it or.

This song, well. yess, Imma start my writing with this song on repeat mode. umm, I don't know what to say. I'm not that worried, I'm not that obvious terrified, I'm not that stupid oso, and uh, I'm not a stone too. I'm a human being that been created with full of love and cares, lot's of it. I can not hope for more, I can not ask for anything that impossible to get. I know where I stand. Also, I know what I want. Me just being myself instead trying to be someone just because wanna please everyone. I need love. I need soul. I need a place or more likely to say a home. Yea, I think I already got it. I thought I've own it, Am I? Oh well, I'm not sure, I don't have any apparent reason to be like this shitty. It just hit me like a lightning. Baamm! right infront of my freakin hideous face. Sometimes, not sometimes but OFTEN. I keep askin myself, why this thingy happens all of sudden, Am I so fuckin annoying ? Am I too stupid to be with you ? Am I that terrible tremendously ugly? Am I don't deserve anything from you ? *SIGH* Well, to be truth, this is not a big deal nor matter I guess? It jes me? HAHA me??? Whatever. I'm strong enough to hold on and stay ;) That's the most friggin IMPORTANT <3 Everything has a solution, I keep bear that in my mind. I always does that ;) that's make me more stronger. Everybody make mistakes we're human being, thus nobody PERFECT ;)

Life's is about you appreciate the present not kept your past and acting like a crap. That's totally wrong! What you should do is keep smiling and leave it there. Meaning to say, accept your past and leave it there and move on. Move on for a better life. I've learn a lot from my past not less from my present too. Head up and keep smiling ;)

Second Month Anniversary & Happy Birthday Heart ;)

Hey, it has been a while since the last post of mine. Alright, here it goes. Actually I want to start this with a song. Well, its your birthday on 5th August. Apologize fer the late post. Allah selamatkan kamu , Allah selamatkan kamu, Allah selamatkan  <3 Allah selamatkan kamu ;) Selamat hari lahir sayang and selamat hari ulang tahun yang kedua ;D My genuine hope is pls be strong and always smile. Yes, you can count on me. Of course you could, I'm your lover and part of your life also. Don't ever forget that I often got your back Heart. I love you with full of my heart, you're my everything fer the time being. Appreciate the present. Enjoy every single bits memory in your life. Cherish every moment. Pls be good okay, take good care of yourself fer me. I'm not usual around to look after you. But don't forget that I always there, there, in your chest, in your Heart ;) Believe me, I won't leave you. That's my promise. You're my fav cutee lion Heart ;) Always does. Till then, I love you the most, miss you a lot sayang xx

Month Anniversary ;)

Here it goes, today is our big date. For me its very important date tho'. We've been thru this relationship for a month. So yeahh, congrats? LOL I just wanna say thank you thank you and thank you. You mean a lot to me sayang. We're gonna thru thick and thin together no matter what happens. I'll try my best to not being so paranoid. I know sometimes I can be as jerk as an ass. Oh well, that's just me. Iam being IMM ;) Thank you for accepting my in your life. Thank you for let me in to be part of your life. As you've said, me completed your life. I'm so in love with you, and that is the reason I've been acting like a jerk lately. I apologize because of that. Theres always a reason of everything happened. I need you, I need you to be there for me and stay. I know we can't get everything that we want. But you're my desire, you're my everything of course I need you to stick with me no matter what is the obstacles. You've said that we're gonna thru this thing together. I think I can count on you sayang. Please stay, and uh on my part yess, I know what I want. I hope its vice versa. Its hard to say, I mean distance is not our main problem. It just sometimes I think too much. Its suck when you're not here by my side. Its killin me. I hope that you can be more patient with me. I am a person that so effin hard to cry. But once I cry, theres must be a concrete reason.

My tears for those who can appreciate me. To those who can accept the way I am, to those who can chill with my attitude. To those who can be there for me. Well um, What the most important is You Love me ;) thats enough for me tho'. My jealousy can kill me silently without me knowing it. I don't know why. maybe I'll peace if you're right infront of me. Yeahh, exactly. Still I won't stop you to doing anything that you want. Thats your life. Please don't stop convincing me also cos I'm easily distracted by a rumors. Always remember your limit. Enough said. Again, Happy 1st Month Anniversary ;) Thank you for everything. Thank you and thank you <3 Me Heart You Love ;)

D&G NO.3

*BIGSMILE*

Well, that's explain everything <3 16th of MAY 2011

=))

You're my melody, You're my soul. You're my rhythm, You're my light <3

XXS =.=

Oh well, I'll make sure that am going to wear this shirt no matter what. Wait, I don't want to lose your smell that lingers on that shirt also, how o,O LOL Thanks, Heart <3

5th of JUNE 2011 =D 2145PM

SPECIAL EDITION

She's still owe me a Boston's Piano version tho' =P

I wish I were there TO GIVE YOU A HUG. Firstly, I want to apologize to you with what I've done towards you,  I feel bad. Like literally am look like a pirate now LOL I hope you will read this. This is specially for you <3 

I know I've been totally a jerk but so you know that am not askin to be like this shitty. I hate when this is happened. I hate when I've hurt someone that I love. I hate when I don't feel like myself. I hate giving a hope. i hate when people started to ask me why am being such an idiot. I hate when this question keep playing and changing it slides in my head. I wish I know the answer. Well, this post actually for a very special and gorgeous girl that had entered in my life. She's amazingly beautiful in and out. She's a person that so I could call as a very good friend of mine. She's a person that I shall talk to like 24/7, I think ? If she want to. You're very understanding and outstanding girl that I've known. Thanks for everything. I appreciate every single things that you've done to me. Thanks for being my friend till now. Thanks for all the cherish and special moments when am with you (lepak sana sini, skype =p ) Here's the thing, HAPPY 20TH BIRTHDAY DARLING <3 

<3 

I don't have anything to give to you yet. But but but, I have an open heart to let you be part of my life. No matter what is the statuses. Yea, I think you can count on me every single bit of everything. I'll try my best to be your best buddy =))

Enjoy your 20th BIRTHDAY, for me you're no longer a teen tho' LOL You're a person that I'll never ever erased in my life. That's all from me *BIGhugggggg*

*SMILE*

Reminiscing =D

Thanks again for being so understanding DOPE girl to me =DD